Wednesday, April 09, 2008

So next time grab a stop watch

A recent survey of sex therapists concluded that sex lasting 3 to 13 minutes is the optimal amount of time.

Really? For whom? Single women hoping to get home to their cats? To quote In the Pink Texas.

The survey did report, however, that sexual intercourse only lasting 1 to 2 minutes is “too short.” No shit, Sherlock.

On the other hand, after a very bad experience I have decided that a relationship needs occasional quickies. This would be a very, very long post I don't want to go into right now. It involves a resolution I made and kept for over two years which I really, really don't want to go into now.

The optimal time does not count foreplay, thank God, and the wacky researcher decided that only insertion counted.

I have a great urge to go down on someone and ask her at the end do you think this doesn't count?

The story mentioned that a 2005 study found median time for sexual intercourse was 7.3 minutes. I knew that. A popular book in the seventies had the title The Seven Minutes referring to an earlier study. I didn't know that Russ Meyer made it into a film. I just saw his Beyond the Valley of the Dolls which had lots of sex, some kinky. There are no stop watches in that movie but it does have some memorable phrases like "Yes I vow, 'ere this night does wane, you will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!"

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